A Pause For The Cause: Love: In Black And White

I recently read a blog post by my buddy Stuart McDonald, you should give it a read ( http://stuartmcdonald.wordpress.com/2009/07/06/yes-i-like-black-women-is-that-a-problem/ ) , that was in response to an article that was disparaging interracial relationships. Like Stuart, or Stuey D. Williams as I like to call him, I am an avid and often times voracious reader of differing opinions. Though a staunch Democrat, I can understand and agree with many Republicans. Though a die hard Chicago Bears fan, I can appreciate and congratulate the Green Bay Packers for such a plethora of accomplishments garnered over their existence. I am a man, but can put myself in the shoes of a woman (not LITERALLY). The point I'm trying to make is that I have always took pride in being able to be judicious and cerebral in my thought process. I am proud of my ability to see both sides of the argument, however, when it comes to those who disagree with interracial relationships, I find them baseless and ignorant. Nothing more. Nothing less. I come from the home of a strong black family and the womb of a strong black woman and my skin is a constant reminder of the heritage I carry. Many feel that dating outside of my race stains that heritage in some way or another. Many feel as if it dilutes my blackness just because the woman at my side is Hispanic or Caucasian or Asian or any other tone that isnt distinctly "brown". I have dated outside of my race many times in the past and it has always been a very pleasant experience behind closed doors. However, I find myself constantly confronted with a world outside my window that is obsessed with turning something so beautiful into something so incredibly ugly. For those who think races should not "mix" tell me what exactly is wrong with two people being in love. I had an older white man tell me that black men who date white women are only doing it because they have a sexual fetish toward "his" women and that we still carried a "chip on our shoulder" from slavery and were anxious to use white women to even the score. Well, I've always been a believer in debunking idiocy with dry logic so here we go: If sexual intercourse in itself is a fetish and white men have been having sex with black women since Aunt Jemima was young, wouldn't that make him part of the worlds "freakiest" ancestry? Secondly, black men DO in fact carry the lingering weight of slavery and racism on their shoulders, but how exactly would dating a white woman "even the score" when it only serves to make everyone act even MORE harshly toward you. Its like taking a bath in honey then running with a bee's nest past Winnie The Pooh...its not that smart of an idea.
I had a black woman tell me that my dating of women outside of my race was pathetic and that I was only doing it because I was intimidated by black women. I love black women. My mother and two sisters are among them and I do believe that there is something quite magnificent about power of a black woman. That being said, I love all women and for one race (even if I happen to be a part of that race) to believe that their struggle is in some way superior to that of another is quite arrogant. It takes strength to be an honest and good woman of ANY race and if we all took the time to look outside of ourselves we would see the beautiful nuances that exist within the culture of our neighbors. I love the strength and beauty a black woman carries with her through the adversities of being black in America and a woman in a man's world. I love the sensuality of hispanic woman and their poise they display living in an America that feels it is quite alright to be racist and misogynistic toward them because Americans seem to feel "its only racism if its aimed at African Americans." Yes, I even love the nature a white woman has to carry because (believe it or not) it is not incredibly easy to be ANY kind of woman in America especially a white woman risking everything to love a man who isnt her same skin color. What I want you to take from this rather long and rather unorganize jumble of thoughts is that it takes bravery to love a person and when a two people of any color decide to make that leap of faith it should be celebrated not denigrated. When I pick a wife it will be a decision made not from sexual fetish or settling scores, nor from loyalty to my race. It will be a decision I have come to earnestly and out of loyalty to my heart. The bible says that God made US in HIS image. I own just about every interpretation of the bible that exists and never have I once seen it say, God made some white people and some black people and come yellow people and some red people and then told them you are all different and you should never come together". When I do read that I will be more than happy to reduce my options to only those sharing my brown skin, but until then I see no point. There is nothing more pure fulfilling than love. Those who choose to live their lives on an empty pursuit of ugliness can do just that. I, however, will enjoy life in all its hues and be all the better for it in the end. Food 4 Thought...eat freely